|
LTD Newsletter
August - October 2007
|
Unless otherwise noted, all events are at 8515
Penfield in Winnetka, directions on last page.
For all events: RSVP the LTD Hotline, 818-886-0069.
|
SPECIAL EVENTS
Members $5.00 - non-members, $7.50
|
PILGRIM FILMS AND TELEVISION ANNOUNCED TODAY A NEW DOCUMENTARY PILOT THAT WILL
CHRONICLE THE RELATIONSHIPS OF NON-CONVENTIONAL COUPLES. THE CASTING DEPARTMENT
IS CURRENTLY SEEKING PEOPLE INVOLVED IN THREE-WAY RELATIONSHIPS AND/OR COUPLES
THAT LIVE WITH OR SHARE ADDITIONAL LOVERS. STORIES WILL BE TOLD FROM THE PROSPECTIVE
OF EACH RELATIONSHIP’S PARTICIPANT. CRAIG PILIGIAN WILL PRODUCE THE SERIES.
MR. PILIGIAN WAS THE CO-EXECUTIVE PRODUCER ON “SURVIVOR: BORNEO,” “SURVIVOR: THE
AUSTRALIAN OUTBACK,” AND “SURVIVOR: AFRICA.” HE IS A CREATOR AND EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
OF “THE ULTIMATE FIGHTER”, “THE CUT,” “AMERICAN CHOPPER,” “AMERICAN HOT ROD,”
“AMERICAN CASINO,” AND “DIRTY JOBS,” AMONG OTHER PRODUCTIONS.
FOR MORE INFORMATION OR TO APPLY FOR THE SHOW, PLEASE CONTACT:
BECKYC@PILGRIMFILMS.COM
|
What do you do when your wife brings her lover home for dinner? Who sleeps where if he
offers (or she invites him) to stay overnight? If your wife is sick on a night you've
got a date, should you cancel and stay home with her? Should your girl friend keep you
company if you do stay home? Emily Post did not cover this stuff, but we will.
1:00 pm – Potluck lunch: Bring something healthy and delicious to share + sandals &
towel for clothing optional hot tubbing. Around 4pm, SF fans among us will caravan to
Conchord, the annual Science Fiction Folk Song (Filk) convention TAKES PLACE FROM August
17 – 19, 2007 at the Warner Center Marriott. (for more information, visit their website
at: www.conchord.org).
Everything from the hilarious Star Trek parody Banned From Argo to the Ballad of Apollo
13 will be sung this weekend. You are welcome to join in the fun whether you’ve got a
great voice and play the guitar or just love to sing / listen.
|
Please let us know at least a couple of days ahead of time if we are to expect and meet
up with you. Cell phone # to reach us at this event only is (818) 388-5612.
Forest and sea meet beautifully at this enchanting location. We’ll spend Saturday
enjoying the beach at Leo Carrillo and swimming in the ocean. We will do dinner at sunset
at Paradise Cove, a delightful restaurant with a great salad bar, fresh seafood, an ocean
view and its own unusual beach! There will be a marshmallow roast and a moonlit walk by
the water.
Cost is park fees and dinner at Paradise Cove - prices are reasonable. Bring Pot Luck
picnic lunch – your own sandwiches and drinks with something to share — chips, cheeses,
fruits—whatever delights you.
|
Oberon Zell, founder of Church of All Worlds, a real life organization based on
Heinlein’s fictional one in Stranger In A Strange Land, is keynote speaker.
Oberon Zell’s keynote speech will be on Group Marriage: How to Put One Together and Make
It Last. He and Terry Brussel-Gibbons will also offer a workshop on Stranger in a Strange
Land and how Heinlein’s writings have been of inspirational and practical value in truly
living a polyamorous life style. Speaking of polyamory, Oberon and his lady Morning Glory
coined the word itself!
CAW was the first neopagan religion to be legally recognized in the US. While Robert
Heinlein did not endorse the church, he was in communication with Oberon regarding it
through letters back and forth. He received his copy of its magazine The Green Egg
regularly. Most of its members originally believed in the relationship concepts presented
in that book: multiply committed deeply loving relationships, group marriage and group
living. Oberon has been in an open committed relationship with Morning Glory since 1974.
They have been in group marriages for much of that time, with as many as eight of them
living together as mates. Oberon has been in a triad lasting ten years and a five person
group marriage lasting nearly that long (Ravenheart). He and Morning Glory continue to be
close to many of those who were involved as friends, lovers and water brethren. Oberon
says “Poly means never having to say goodbye.” One reason those relationships lasted as
long as they did is that the people were involved in building Church of All Worlds,
raising unicorns (real ones!) producing the Green Egg magazine, and Oberon’s spiritual
sculpture business (Gaia and other gods/goddesses beautifully rendered.) Groups doing
meaningful things together tend to last longer.
Its Green Egg magazine (now -2007- an on-line magazine rather than a printed one) is
fascinating and frequently contains lifestyles related material. Find out more about
Oberon, CAW and the Green Egg at www.caw.org and
www.greeneggzine.com.
HYPNOFANTASY/HYPNOCARESS LEAD BY TERRY BRUSSEL-GIBBONS PH.D.,
CERTIFIED CLINICAL HYPNOTHERAPIST
Hypnosis demonstration shows you how to slay the green eyed monster and release sexual
inhibitions which no longer serve you. Learn ways to experience the delights of full
body multiple orgasms combined with intense spiritual connection. Then: Bring your
senses alive through guided
fantasy... Orchestrated Hypnocaress (caring gentle touch) --for dyads, triads and
loving groups. Romantic music heightens the intimacy. Mmmm...
We'll climax this workshop with a LOVE MAGNET guided meditation which will help
you attract the
new partners you desire while enhancing your love relationship with the
partner(s) already in your life!
STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND – A WORKSHOP
Oberon Zell joins with Terry and Paul Brussel Gibbons to present a workshop
based on the concepts of Stranger in a Strange Land and how real life people act on them.
We will be focusing on what it means to Share Water,,acquire Chosen Family and how
one maintains these
relationships over time–from non residential intimate networks to fully residential
group marriages.
We’ll also discuss the commitments involved when a water brother is a secondary
romantic partner for many years spanning (in some cases) more than one marriage.
Go to www.familysynergy.com.
|
We’ll discuss the story of a man in two very loving relationships. One is with his wife,
business partner, and mother of his young children. The other is an intensely romantic
bonding with a lovely singer, poet and paramedic. His secondary partner accompanies him
on a space mission to reveal to human kind that contact has been secretly made with our
first alien species. They can teach us about travel to more inhabitable worlds. We can
teach them about love…
|
6:30 pm POT LUCK : Bring a dish big enough for 10
-
A-F Your favorite Meat, cheese, nut, fish or other delicious protein type dish
-
G-M Juices or fresh fruit
-
N-R Salads
-
S-Z Deserts and treats
Also: Bring your favorite scary story and/or a tape or CD to dance to.
HOT TUB AVAILABLE ALL EVENING--CLOTHING OPTIONAL Bring towel and sandals.
ALL HALLOWS EVE RITUAL (outside under the stars)... Bring something you want to let
go of--a symbol or written note. It will be cleansed in the cauldron's flame...
HALLOWEEN PARTY follows. Costume as ye will and/or be Body Painted in some beautiful
and unusual way by other participants. Body paint supplied by LTD. You are welcome to
do some sort of dramatic or funny presentation appropriate to your costume.
Audio equipment available for sound effects--call ahead to plan it with Paul
(LTD hot line) if you have something elaborate in mind. Be creative!
Scary Story telling in living room by the fire!
ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW VIDEO AT 9:30pm.
Cost: $7.50 non members/$5.00 to members.
|
All of you receiving this newsletter also received (at my request) the Family Synergy
Newsletter. Please read it and give some serious thought to joining that group. The
upcoming Family Synergy Conference in Big Bear promises to be something really
special with Oberon Zell as the Keynote speaker. The very word polyamoury was
created by he and his wife Morning Glory. He is the founder of Church of All Worlds
and has been in group marriages of from three to nine partners with many years
duration.
It is my belief that the more solidarity which can be developed among poly groups,
the more we as members of the wider Poly Community will benefit in terms of a
variety of like minded people to relate to and the cross pollination of different ideas
and philosophies. Greater numbers who agree on wanting similar freedoms will give
us more political clout.
Also, we’ll all have more poly
partners to cuddle with!
If you have any questions about this or just want to
talk, feel free to call me
at (818) 886-0069 or
Go to www.familysynergy.com.
|
A few weeks ago Vick called to invite me to see his new home-- "And be sure to bring Paul!" He has
been my lover for nearly quarter of a century and through three different wives. He and my
husband have had a relationship, too, during the seven years we've been together. Vick's present
wife, Helga, had been uncomfortable with our visiting him in their home, so I haven't seen the place
he had been living in for nearly two years. It is a very strange feeling not to be able to visualize his
space in my mind. It's out of state, so I wouldn't have been there frequently anyway, but I have
always spent some time in the home Vick lived in. He has visited on our end several times while
living in that house. Finally, Helga decided it was ok for Paul and me to be there as long as the
three of us did not sleep/make love in their big bed. We could sleep in the guest room while she
visited her family in Europe.
Paul and I arrive by plane early enough in the day to visit a local wild animal park featuring BIG
cats--white tigers, lions, leopards and cougars. There are also wolves about the place and even a
few bears. All of these creatures live in guarded harmony with each other and their loving human
companions who do not train them, but play with them instead. The shows are actually play times.
The announcer is careful to inform us, however, that these are wild animals. Such things as territory
and Alpha, Beta, Theta ranking mean something here. The huge white tiger which a staff member is
playing with in the lake may decide he is not allowed to be here anymore and that staff member will
hightail it out of there--fast.
Do humans have a territorial instinct? Yes. For each of us it is different. To some men--"You touch
my woman, you die." Others like my husband Paul, never learned jealousy at all. Helga will share
her man, but not her bed and preferably not while she's anywhere close to it. I'll share my man, but
I'd rather be right there. Our bed is a good place for this. Does this mean I am not territorial? It might
mean I feel safer in my own space. Guess who is the alpha female there?
When we reach Vick's house I look around at familiar furniture and paintings which have been in his
life longer than I have. His mother's art work which I've always loved. The bedroom I will not be
sleeping in looks like it was transplanted from his place in California to this new home. The bed is
the one we've shared so many times over so many years. I keep wandering in and out of there
dealing with feelings of upset...betrayal...frustrated territoriality, probably. It might have been easier
if this had all been different, more affected by her than by Vick. This is too much like being shut out
of my own bedroom.
Vick and I cuddle by the fire near the same piano which has always been in his living room. Paul is
installing something in Vick's computer. He comes out and the three of us soak a while in the
jacuzzi. We talk of Vick's shamanic work, the nature of power, and what it means to be wholly
responsible for the state of one's life.
Quite late, we enter the bedroom to sleep, perchance to love. It is a double bed for three people
while a king size one lies empty in the next room. Ridiculous? I am tempted to say so and get Vick
to BE REASONABLE. I don't ask and I doubt that he'd go for it if I did. It is our agreements which
make it safe enough for some of us to be willing to leave behind the tried and true ways of
monogamous marriage for a path filled with strange objects which could bear thorns. It is the
agreements I have with Paul which make me feel safe enough to share him even though such
sharing has been my way throughout my adult life. For Helga it is a much newer thing. She is taking
it at the pace she can handle and only she knows what that is.
Ok boys--you inhale I'll exhale...
2007 addendum
A few years ago, Helga became upset over my relationship with Vick. She wanted him to stop
seeing me. He was not willing to do that and sought counseling to deal with the issue. The
counselor asked her whether she knew I was part of Vick’s life when she married him. She
admitted she did. The counselor advised her to honor the agreements under which she had chosen
to marry Vick. She settled for barring me from visiting Vick in her home, though she has always
been cordial to me when I happen to get her on the phone at their home. Recently the issue of
territory came up again. Vick wanted to share his home with those he loved, including Paul and
me. In a Ceremony, he danced his willingness to go so far as to let go of Helga if she could not
handle this. Fortunately, Helga danced her openness to supporting her husband’s Freedom and
Passion. Soon we will be visiting Vick at home.
At my home, I am on the other side of this conflict. I am for the first time in thirty-five years of Poly
living in the position of refusing to let my husband’s lover into our home. He is seeing a woman
who has chosen not to speak to me. This is a lady who lived with us until about six months ago
and decided to move out due to conflicts between us. I fully expected us to talk our conflicts out. It
did not seem likely that we would be able to make living together work as some of those conflicts
made us incompatible as room mates. I expected we would find a way for her become a family
member living outside our home, one who would be warmly welcome for meals , weekends, outings
together, etc. That is not what happened and I am not willing to have my home invaded by a
declared hostile adversary even when I am not there.
Vick and I had enacted a similar scene of parting in 1992 when we broke our engagement because
we could not live together well, but decided to continue being lovers. Oberon Zell says being Poly
means you never have to say good by. This is true if one is willing to take the trouble to heal hurts
which can come from changing relationships from primary to secondary, from sexual to platonic and
back again, etc. Some relationships weather these transitions and remain close through it all.
Others do end, despite the participants being poly.
What do you do when one member of a couple (or two members of a triad) choose to continue a
relationship with someone who will not interact with his or her spouse? Is this being poly or having
an old fashioned extra marital affair? There are emotional issues of hurt and betrayal. There are
also practical issues. How are dates between multiple partners scheduled without communication
between two of them? Who sleeps at which house when? Is staying out over night appropriate
under these circumstances? Here are several “etiquette” questions we are still in the process of
resolving…
|
If you have a “What do you do when...?” for publication please E-Mail it to
Live_The_Dream2000@yahoo.com
or send it to 8515 Penfield Ave. Winnetka, Ca. 91306. We will take it with
your solution or brain storm and give it one or more of our
own. Let’s have fun with this and learn from each other.
|
WHAT EXPERIENCES, BOOK REVIEWS, ETC, CAN YOU
SHARE RELATING TO THE POLY LIFESTYLE?
KNOW OF ANY OTHER POLY RELATED EVENTS?
LET US KNOW ABOUT THEM!
GIVE US YOUR STORIES
We need your stories for research purposes
— your names will remain anonymous.
If you have been hassled by the government for your lifestyle,
particularly by any child services department, we want to hear
from you by phone, in writing or by E-Mail.
|
Our phone number is 818-361-6737.
Our mailing address is
8515 Penfield Avenue
Winnetka, CA 91406
Our e-mail address is:
Live_The_Dream2000@yahoo.com
Live_The_Dream2000@yahoo.com
|
PLEASE FILL OUT AND MAIL THE
MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION
NOW, or call to indicate an interest
in continuing to receive this newsletter by USPS.
NEWSLETTER SUBSCRIPTION
IS ONLY FREE BY E-MAIL — WE NEED YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS
FOR THAT. REGULAR MEETINGS ARE NOW FREE WITH YOUR CURRENT MEMBERSHIP
CARD.
|
FOR ALL EVENTS PLEASE RSVP THE LTD HOT LINE: 818-886-0069.
LOCATION OF ALL EVENTS UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED:
8515 PENFIELD AVE. IN WINNETKA (ZIP 91306). NEAR CHASE AND WINNETKA.
FREEWAY OFF RAMPS: WINNETKA OFF 101, ROSCOE OFF 405, TAMPA OFF 118
THOMAS BROS. LOS ANGELES MAP PAGE 530 E1 (that's E ONE)
Where jacuzzi is mentioned, bring towel and sandals.
Jacuzzi is clothing optional.
|
|
